Dead But Still Remembered
by beckie2009i
Summary: Sherlock/John- John's Life without Sherlock and the realisation that he had feellings for him. What would happen when he finally returned? Bad Language to follow!


Dead But Still Remembered

"Sher…." John sniffed "Sherlock Holmes, My best friend is dead" Sherlock Holmes my best friend, my flat mate, the man I loved was dead, jumped off a building, a hospital and they could not save him. "John?" said my therapist snapping me out of my trance "It sounds like you have things you wanted to say to him and didn't" John nodded "Say them now" asked his therapist "No, Sorry" said John those words where for Sherlock's ears only. "Thank you for everything Sarah!" said John as he stood up shook his therapist, Sarah's hand and walked out. It had been 6 weeks since Sherlock's death and now it seems Moriaty's as well it was found as part of Sherlock's death investigation that the criminal mastermind himself, had shot himself in the mouth concluding the investigation as a double suicide. John hailed a cab back to Baker Street, he had no clue what he was going to do, stay in Baker Street even London or leave. Sherlock's phone call to him on the rooftop, his last phone call replayed in his mind he wished he had told him what he meant to him. John arrived at 221B Baker Street, paid the driver and walked inside, Mrs Hudson hugged John telling him things would get better. Wow his therapist was worried about him doing something stupid and joining Sherlock, he was going to but not yet. Things where not getting or going to get any better when Mrs Hudson stopped hugging him he gave her a fake smile and went upstairs. His flat no Sherlock and his' flat, Sherlock stuff was still everywhere his funny hat that all the paper use to like putting on their front covers that he hated, his skull of a friend her use to say and his second favourite scarf still hung up ready to be used but it never would. This flat would never feel like home like before not without Sherlock. He sat down in his seat looking at Sherlock's, John placed his head in his hands he really did miss him. There was a knock at the door and Lestrade walked in and said "There's been a murder" "Why you here Greg he's gone?" John looked at Sherlock's chair trying to hold back the tears "I know John but no one has been able to crack this one and you're the best I have got and the only option left!" "Right fine I will not be as fast as Sherlock but I will come I will be a minute" John replied as he walked into Sherlock's room he sniffed. He went to his wardrobe and got his birthday present; his birthday was two days after Sherlock's death but John's wish would have been to have Sherlock back. The wrapping paper red and spotty with a label which read: Dearest John, Happy Birthday, Hope for all the best, Love yours forever SH. John smiled at the label Sherlock's lazy crossing out meant that John could read every word; he just wished Sherlock had been there for his birthday was here by his side now "John hurry up" said Lestrade "Yes I'm coming" said John as he put on the coat, gloves and scarf that Sherlock had got him and walked out. Lestrade gave him the weirdest of looks "Sherlock got them for me for my birthday, I want him close" Lestrade nodded and walked out and down the stairs John followed and shouted "Mrs Hudson, I'm going out be back later and there is no need to ring Mycroft I will not be jumping off any buildings this morning" Mrs Hudson came out of her flat with a phone "Sorry Mycroft false alarm John is fine" she hung up and put the phone back " Wow John, you look the splitting image of him that was good choice by Sherlock" " You knew Sherlock was going to get this for me?" John asked "Yes he came to me asking if I thought it was a good idea I said yes, so he went out and got it. Sherlock was never any good at expressing feelings John but this gift he wanted to be perfect and special because he does care about you" John looked at Mrs Hudson trying to fight off the tears he walked up to her and hugged her "Thank you" he said "Now off you go, go do what you both loved" she said pulling away giving me a reassuring smile. My mind was now made up although the painful memoires of Sherlock are here I would stay in Baker Street till I die which will not be too long. I hoped. "John" shouted Lestrade John walked out of 221B waved at Mrs Hudson shut the door and got into the front of the police car. His new beginning he did not really like it but it was a start to the end.

The silent drive took us the outskirts of London when we stopped Lestrade got out then John and they walked to the crime scene Anderson and Sally where there "I thought the freak was dead?" said Anderson "He is, but I am not" said John bitterly "Who is this Lestrade?" asked the superintendent the one John had punched and broke his nose "John Watson" said Lestrade "The one who broke your nose!" added Sally "What he and his friend should be in prison for escaping police arrest he should not be allowed on this crime scene!" "Well sir" tried Lestrade "Greg let me, I would not go to prison because one I was a hostage and two you deserved that punch because you are the biggest dick I have ever seen bigger than Sherlock Holmes himself and also my friend Sherlock Holmes is dead alright jumped off of a building because of people like you being total asses towards and making him feel like he is an outcast that he was not normal well Sir idiot he was brilliant he could figure out a person by just what they looked like and what I have heard you can't seem to solve this and if Sherlock was still alive he would have had it solved by now. I am no Sherlock Holmes but I am pretty damn close now do you want my help or not!" said John angrily not very Sherlock manner but still it was his way and he needed that off of his chest. The superintendent was stunned so was Sally, Anderson and Lestrade "Carry on" he said and left Sally and Anderson went back to the squad car to do something John looked around the area was deserted there where CCTV on the corner which most likely caught the moment of the murder "Well done John, I thought you where the quite one" said Lestrade "I am, but they had it coming I have be dealing with this crap for the last 6 weeks and they just tipped it over the edge"

Chapter 2

"Well her name is Mindy Smith" said Lestrade John look around the body "it is a lady in her mid twenties her clothes are ripped suggesting she was raped before and after her death. She was under a lot of stress by the state of her nails she had been carrying a handbag in her right hand which was the murder weapon her rapist hit her over the head with it due to her fighting back she also had a suitcase and by the looks" looks at her left hand "she had a just left her husband and was meeting her lover here most likely to move in together I can't be sure but by the looks of the splashes on the back of her legs it was quite a big suitcase so moving in together seems the best option" Lestrade looked shunned "Wow, You really did learn a lot from him but one thing there was no handbag she was shot with a shotgun we are amazed no one heard it or saw it happening but the gun is here" John looked at the body again "No Greg she was shot after her death to make it look like suicide, the handbag that she defiantly had because some of the dye had come off in her right palm was heavy by the looks of the damage and a single blow to the head killed her she died of internal bleeding from a fractured skull check the autopsy and you will see that I was right. Furthermore have you checked the CCTV footage" "Yes but there's nothing much in it" Lestrade replied "Could I have a copy of it send to 221B and the autopsy results please Good morning" said John as he walked away. Lestrade walked up to Anderson and Sally who had heard everything "Well we now have another freak" said Anderson "Anderson shut up but he has learnt a lot from Sherlock" replied Lestrade "He is on the border line of super freak like Sherlock at the moment he is just a freak" said Sally "Sally!" said Lestrade.

As John walked away from the crime scene he was trying to work out where her handbag had gone then her looked around and saw a small alleyway which was only just bigger enough to walk down most likely the police hadn't thought to looked down here so he did. The alley way was dark and smelly most likely the smell came from awful Chinese that was next door. When he reached the end of the alleyway there was a fence which lead to another alleyway but in front of the fence was a skip "Can the police be that stupid" said John to himself as he jumped among the rubbish trying not to get his Sherlock coat dirty he then found a blue handbag the colour identical to the dye on Mindy's right palm he looked inside a phone, purse, makeup the normal for a girl to have in her bag he opened the purse to find credit card with Mindy Smith written on them "Really the police where that stupid" John laughed to himself but Anderson was meant to check the area but the out of the purse he saw a note which read: _she deserved to die and for every week from now on I will kill another each getting bigger than the last I will make this city feel like how I am feeling now. Welcome the game John Watson M._ John looked at the note again and re-read it M was the signature of Moriaty but he was dead great another mystery to solve who the hell was M. John's suicide may be further away than he first thought he put everything back in the bag and walked back down the alley until he reached the entrance and back to the crime scene keeping the bag behind his back. Anderson, Sally and Lestrade where still there chatting most likely about his attire "Who was meant to search the area?" John asked "John why are you back and Anderson?" replied Lestrade "Well he did a good job" said John sarcastically showing them the bag "It's Mindy's and we have a serial murdering rapist on the lost who is threatening to kill by the week" John replied. "What" shouted all "Well I will be going, start making links back at Baker Street" John replied and walked away. When he reached a main road he got a bus back to London than a taxi to Baker Street. Mrs Hudson waited for him "How was it dear" she asked "Well we may have a serial murdering rapist on the loose who is taking after Moriaty, Is Moriaty or someone Moriaty trained but other than that it was brilliant" John gave a smile which an actually smile Mrs Hudson smiled "Oh, Mrs Hudson could you ring Mycroft and asked him to come over if he says he is busy tell him I am having suicidal thoughts" John said "Are You?" Mrs Hudson asked concerned "No I need to talk to him and I am not meeting him in the back and beyond." "Ok Dear" said Mrs Hudson picking up the phone and dialling Mycroft's number John made his way upstairs and decided to update his blog. He switch on his laptop got on his website and typed: _Six Weeks, __I took six weeks before the police to come struck in their cases well the world's only consulting detective's assistant is picking up where the world's one and only detective Sherlock Holmes left off I am now open for business for anyone needed a case to be solved. I am not over Sherlock but he is dead and still remembered. Payment fees to be as followed:_

_Per Hour: £10 _

_Needed to travel to location outside London (excluding cost per hour): £100_

_NO overseas cases at the moment_

_And also Harry no stupid comments please actually that is to everyone!_

Chapter 3

John smiled as he uploaded his status to his blog then there was a knock at the door "Hello Mycroft" said John without even looking at the door "John you look the spitting image of my late brother and it seems you have picked up his skills as well" Mycroft said as showing my blog page with the new status "I am not even going to ask how" John said " Mrs Hudson said you where having suicidal thoughts" Mycroft said "No just could not be assed to find you in that awful club or go to the back and beyond to meet you somewhere I have some questions" "What are they" Mycroft asked "1 is James Moriaty alive and 2 did he talk about any one special?" Mycroft was silent walked down and sat in John's chair John stood up from the table walked to the kitchen to make tea before taking his coat, scarf and gloves off after tea was ready he brought it back in and gave a glass to Mycroft who thanked him and sat down on the chair from the table not wanting to sit in Sherlock's chair "Well" John pushed "No, Moriaty is dead and Yes he did to talk to me over someone" "Who?" asked John "His name is Sebastian Moran, what I got from James Moriaty was that Seb as he called him was his lover, his best friend and his assistant kinda like you and Sherlock he was Moriaty right hand man but always kept out of the spotlight" "Great brilliant you didn't think to tell me this!" said John sarcastically and angrily "What why?" "Well Moran is going raping and murdering people and threatening to make the next worst than the last brilliant and thinks it's a game and welcome me to play like Moriaty he has stayed out of the CCTV footage. Mycroft this would have been good information to tell me after Sherlock's death because I bet that Moran wants me dead because he thinks Sherlock killed Moriaty brilliant absolutely brilliant" said John getting out of his seat and pacing the length of the room Mycroft finished his tea looked at his watch "I'm sorry John but I thought telling you would have made the situation worst well I have a government meeting I need to go to. Behave and don't do anything rash" Mycroft said as he walked as soon as he got out of Baker Street he picked the phone and called and unknown number "Tell Red Eagle Moran has surfaced in London raping and killing girls at the moment the threat has been issued as Welcome to the game John Watson." Mycroft hung as he car pulled up he got in the back and said "Parliament please driver"

Chapter 4

Well if my life could get any harder I got a text from Lestrade saying that the autopsy result where in at the hospital but he was not allowed to give him a copy. John had been avoiding the hospital since Sherlock's death, Molly understood his grief so did not push to ask him to first but john knew he would have to face up with his fears and facts and go and that was what he was going to do he opened up his laptop sat back down in his chair and uploaded a status which read: _New Case:__ Game on Moran. Bring it! _I smiled to myself very Sherlock like got up put on my new work attire and walked out to the pace that had ended my life as I had known it. When I arrived I made my way to where Molly worked even after 6 weeks I could still remembered the walk and smiled the times that Sherlock had grabbed Molly saying that him, me and her where having a lunch date instead of her having a date so he could use the equipment. I sniffed I did really miss him and the hours before his death becoming fugitives and the argument we had minutes before his death because of Mrs Hudson I wished I had stayed with him. I walked into Molly's work area to see her face light up "John" she asked "I was warned but you do look the spitting image of him" as she run up and hugged him "How are you" "Ok" I replied "Mrs Hudson every single time I leave the flat rings Mycroft to keep an eye on me worried I will do something harsh Anderson and Sally saying I am a freak and having found out that Moriaty had a right hand man" "What" said the both of them before Molly could say something reassuring Lestrade asked "Details about this right hand man" " Sherlock was right when he met him when he was with Molly, he was gay Jim, James Moriaty had a flatmate, a best friend, a lover who keep out of the limelight but knows every trick in the book, his assistant Mycroft told me he thought not telling me would be the best option did you see the note in Mindy's bag?" John asked "Yes did you accept?" "yep see my status" Molly went to her computer and got onto John's website/blog her Lestrade read the status and smiled "Good for you and for the attire how and why?" Molly said "Well Sherlock got it for my birthday" Molly look like she was thinking "but that was two days after" "yep I found it in his room on my birthday I was actually looking for my cake hat which sings 'Happy Birthday' when you put it on Sherlock had hid it when I was going to make him wear it for his birthday well I found a present wrapped and address me unwrapped and saw this Best birthday present ever" John said with a smile then John's phone went off Unknown number his display read he picked it up knowing only 2 people would hide their number and put it on speaker John had a guess it was the last person he wanted to talk to "Mycroft what the hell do you want I am on a case?" John said angrily "Sorry John Mrs Hudson thought you had done something rash" "Mycroft you do not need to keep tabs on me 24 hrs a day 7 days a week if I have an urge to jump off a cliff or building I will do it I will not have some Nancy boy telling what I can and can't do just because his late brother and I where friends and if you think about referring my to my therapist again Mycroft I swear I will do something I might regret now leave me alone I am trying to solve a case!" John shouted through the phone Mycroft and Red Eagle flinched John hung up and put his phone in the inside pocket of the coat a first he always kept his phone in his trouser pocket as his hand came out it brushed something

Chapter 5

John grabbed it and pulled it out it was a letter John looked Lestrade and Molly gasped "Is that who I think that is from" asked Molly "Yep" said John he put it back in his pocket "Well what we got" Molly snapped out trying to find out what was going on and went into work mode "You where right the hand bag killed single blow to the head dead of a fractured skull and internal bleeding but dead end on the gun no prints not even hers so we can say it is not a suicide" Mistake John thought well Moran wasn't as good as he thought no prints meant that that was not the gun "Is the shot to the head the same bullet that would fit in the gun?" John asked "That was what I was getting to she was shot after her death to make it look like suicide but the bullet in her head and the guns rounds are not the same" "he swapped guns, Clever" John mumbled Lestrade got on his radio "We need a gun expert" as he started giving the address "3.6 mm pistol shot at close range by someone who is left handed and over 6 ft tall" John said "Never mind" said Lestrade into the radio before switching it off "How" "Army" John replied "Moran is a professional he knows who to pick on when he is not on the CCTV because he hacked it and put a clean bit on loop, easy to do if you know people and if you are lover to Jim you have a little black book with everyone number that you would ever need to pull off anything" He thought for a while "he is going to kill someone at Saturdays football game with the initials JW" "What" "Moran put into his note 'Welcome to the Game John Watson' he knew I would read so why would he put it he is giving us a clue on who is going to be killed next" John could feel the letter in his pocket the last words from Sherlock Holmes he was worried to read it be knew he had to "Anything else" John asked wanting to go and read his letter "Yes actually a lower key investigation a vicar had been murdered in a church all forms of enter or exit looked no clue but there is a bullet wound on his head and a gun but there is no motive for him to commit suicide any ideas" Lestrade asked "Pick me up tomorrow around 10 and I will have a look" John said taking his phone brushing his hand against the letter and then putting the event in his diary see you tomorrow Greg, Good to see you Molly I will be in touch" John said and left after he was long gone "How long before he has had enough" Lestrade asked "I will say 2 weeks he has learnt a lot form Sherlock I was amazed he has not worked out about you and Mycroft" Molly replied "Molly, shut up you are the only one who knows about that even Mycroft work people don't know that and they work for the government" John got a taxi home and went to read his letter he sat down in his chair and took out the letter then the doorbell went I ignored and turned back to the letter "John you got a client" Mrs Hudson shouted Great "Ok send them up thank you Mrs Hudson" John got out of his chair and sat in Sherlock because he wanted the genius close. He heard the stairs creak and stood ready to welcome his guest when the person he defiantly did not expect walked through the door. "Hello John" she said John looked and his jaw dropped.

Chapter 6

Irene Adler but she was dead, dead beheaded unless Sherlock that sly brilliant man he disappeared for 3 days and came back with a tan said he had a case in Spain and was not allowed to tell me the details he had rescued her OMG. "You may think I was dead" she said with a smile snapping me out of my trance "I thought so until 2 minutes ago Sherlock saved you didn't he?" "Yes he did nice coat by the way so where is the genius I have missed him and I have got him a good case" Irene asked "Have you not heard?" John asked "Heard what?" Irene asked "He's dead" John said Irene face fell "What?" "Your late employer made everyone believe he was a fake and he jumped..." John gulped not wanting to relive it tears fell "a building" Irene looked like she was going to jump off a building like I had been 6 weeks ago "How long?" she asked "6 weeks" John said as a tear fell "Well time to moving don't get depressed by the past have you taken over his cases" she asked "Re-opened today" John said with a slight smile thinking about it "Do you want a drink?" he asked "No just passing through my husband has disappeared and I was wondering if Sherlock and you could find him?" John looked at Irene scanned her was wearing designer clothing and shoes costing £1000 and was having an affair her husband had left here "John don't try it Sherlock could never" before she had finished her sentence "You are wearing clothing totalling £1000 you have 3 little dogs with your ex-husband" "Excuse me?" she asked "Did you get a note or anything he found out about your affairs and has left you I think" John said then a phone went off Irene looked at it and sniffed "Your right" She said "You have picked a lot up" "Thanks I try my best" John replied "How are you coping, without him" pointing to the chair I had just got out of "Ok first couple of weeks where tough especially with his funeral on my birthday but Lestrade and Mycroft came in here together every day and looked" He trailed off thinking no they can't be they are defiantly haha can't wait to the mick out of Greg when I next see him "Poor you" she said and hugged me "Well I am sorry I can't stand here and chat I have a coffee with a friend I need to go to John here is my number call me anything if you are having a problem" Irene wrote her number down and began to walk out "Irene watch Seb Moran is around, Moriaty's lover/assistant he may and they and get his revenge" John said "Thanks John call me anytime" She said before leaving. John sat down in Sherlock's chair and pulled out the letter addressed to him it read:

_John, I feel that my life will soon be over and there are still a few things I need to tell you before I go. But first and apology, I am sorry I dragged you into my world I know you always said you would never of missed it but I wished you kinda had because then my judgement would of not been clouded into making the judgements which have lead to my death. John you always said that I was the hero but I was defiantly not I have caused all of what is happening to you and me. Another thing I have said to my lawyers if I am to die I leave the flat in yours and Mycroft's names and everything in it for you two to decide what to do with it. Finally John, my friend, as you know I am not good at emotions but this present I wanted to be perfect and special Mrs Hudson helped me pick it well I picked it she agreed with it, but I hope you like it because the next thing I have to say which I was going to tell you on your birthday is I love you since the day I met you I felt something between us I just wish I had been alive to tell you how much you meant to me. Thank you for the laughs, the enjoyment on cases and the friendship you have given me. _

_John you will always be my friend, my flatmate, my lover._

_Yours forever and always_

_Sherlock Holmes_

John broke down crying he could not believe that Sherlock had the same feeling he had Moran was going to pay for his lover taking my lover away from me before I got the chance of telling him. But then I thought no I am joining my lover today. John re-reads the letter and walked out. Tonight he would join his lover.

Chapter 7

As I walked down the stairs I heard Mrs Hudson talking to me but I could not hear the words coming out of her mouth I walked straight out of the door hailed and cab and asked it to take me to the place that we where ripped apart at. Mrs Hudson looked at the door and reached for the phone "Mycroft, he has a letter in his hands think Sherlock wrote it before he died I think tonight the night" "Thank you Mrs Hudson I go get him" Mycroft hung up the phone then rung Lestrade and Molly to tell them tonight John was going to attempt to kill himself. He just hoped they got there in time. He walked out got his car and took him to the hospital where they all knew John would do it. He was the first Lestrade pulled up in a police car and smiled at me with the smile he knew drove me crazy he got out walked over to me and mumbled an hi you I took my hand out off my pocket and offered it to him he took it and smiled "have you seen him" he asked " no" I replied Molly walked up with a blanket and a friend Julia Why


End file.
